Ok….I admit it….. I have a huge problem. INDECISIVENESS!! I think that most designers find themselves in this same situation from time to time in that it seems nearly impossible to to feel as if you have truly finished a project – be it your room, your event, or in my current case – MY WEBSITE!! I know my website designer would probably like to wring my neck right about now due to my indecision, but I can’t help it! Maybe I have adult onset ADD, or perhaps it’s just a serious case of wanting to make sure that every little detail is perfect before launch. But ever since I was little, when it came to my own space, I’ve been notorious for design indecision. My favorite past time when I was younger was changing the color of a room – and then re-changing it. My childhood bedroom went from pale green, to hot pink, to pale yellow, to peanut butter – all in the course of one year. I know my Daddy wanted to wring my neck due to my indecision back then too, especially since he was the one that had to foot the bill for the paint, move all of my furniture, and then paint my bedroom! But being the Daddy that he is, he allowed me to creatively express myself through my color choices – or more appropriately, my color indecision.
Today, my husband will find me moving heavy furniture around, or unloading heavy bags and goods from my car by myself that I bought on an unexpected (by him, anyway) trip to the “Red Dot Boutique” (aka “Target”) or Home Goods to redesign a room in our home. “Why didn’t you ask me to help you?” or “why didn’t you wait for me to get home so that I could move the heavy chest instead of you pushing it across the floor with your legs?” he always asks. My answer is always the same, well, because – sigh – 1) I needed the workout (you’d be amazed at how effective moving furniture around a few times can be as an upper and lower body workout) and 2) because I truly didn’t want to have to simultaneously explain to you WHY I’m changing the room……AGAIN. Although my hubby is a sport, I know it can be quite frustrating at times living with a dizzy designer that never feels any room in our home is totally finished. Not limited to just our home, even our wedding fell victim to it. When I planned our wedding, the morning before the event I was still thinking of and looking for additional elements that could be added to our simple October garden wedding until my husband said “enough Babe. Everything is perfect the way you have it.” And you know, it was :o)
It’s funny how those feelings arise. You work hard as a designer to pull a space or an event together and on the surface it looks great. You stand back and mull over each detail and fuss with each throw pillow. Everyone says that your project is wonderful, the client is pleased, and you feel that your work is done. But be that as it may, it never completely erases the feeling that just one more decor item for an event, or just one more accessory for a room was all that was needed to fill the void – regardless of if there was truly a void there or not. Hence the cycle of the dizzy designer begins again….. Anyone else out there suffering from the same problem??